We just received news that a second couple that we have been long time friends with is getting divorced. As in, they have had counseling and she has been in a different state for most of the year. In both cases, it is the WIFE who has the irreconcilable differences.
This causes me to think seriously on my role as wife and mom. These women are tearing down their house with their own hands (Proverbs 14:1).
To add insult to injury, when you are in conservative evangelical ministry, you usually lose your job when there is a divorce. Both of these husbands have been or are in the ministry. This means both wives have done the hard work of being a seminary wife and helping their husband get out of school and get established in his career. And both, after 17 years of marriage have thrown up their hands and walked out, with their kids.
A counselor we know in Dallas has a wonderful quote,
"Are you murdering or redeeming?"
In every relationship, in every interaction, you are either murdering or redeeming. As believers, we obviously have the job of redeeming. But, what about when our feelings are hurt, or we are tired, or lonely (even though we are married)? We have the hard job of persevering in being redeeming to others, and we find out a little secret..... God's grace is sufficient.